A Wide Sandwich
(but watch your diet for it can ruin the first (legal) ball of the season).
The first game of the season for ACC5 was a wide sandwich. In the sense that it started and ended with a wide. Perhaps a bit more like a clubsandwich for there were lots of other wides inbetween as well. Although it must be said that like a clubsandwich there were many very tasty and juicy bits in there. In fact it was a very tasty sandwich indeed. What stands out most was the overall flavour of the game. What to think of the five lbw’s Olympia’s umpires gave. It says a little of how much the ball stayed low, but a lot also of the gentlemanlike spirit the game was played in. Many a joke passed between the two teams and not only in an effort to get into the batsmans mind. Their overgangsklasse bowler remarked on how gezellig it was and our overgangsklasse bowler wanted to say the same but still cant pronounce the word.


The three new members of ACC: Alex Taylor, Frank vd Meijden and Robert England effortlessly fitted into our outfit and the age-old process of trying on nicknames for the newbies was of course started by the old hands. They shall of course only be announced when tried by time and the pronounciation abilities of our overgangsklasse bowler, so expect them halfway the season when perhaps they have qualified for the ACC5 baggy cap. The exact criteria for qualification for this wanted cap are clouded in mystery as many of the cricketing skills of ACC5 are as well. Nevertheless we managed to bowl Olympia all out for 143. The wickets went to:

Marvin Watts 3-7 in 8
Robert Wolfe 3-12 in 5
Paul Liebenberg 2-19 in 5
Richard Matchett 1-17 in 7
Bert Hartskeerl 1-17 in 2

Of course in every clubsandwich there is something odd. Sometimes its an off pickle or you bite on the little stick that is supposed to hold the whole thing together. In this game it was Big Lad’s fielding. No not the two dropped catches, although they were funny enough, but the moment when Olympia did the old two batsmen at one end trick. The ball is turned straight to Marvin at squareleg, despite that fact the off-strike batsman calls and charges across. The man who played the shot holds his ground and we have the situation of squareleg holding the ball, two batsman at the crease and Big Lad the bowler waiting for the ball at the other end. The off-strike batsman started back but after two steps gave up running, for there were three players backing up Big Lad by now, even an overthrow couldn’t save him the Olympian knew and he resorted to a sulky jog. However he had not taken into consideration the winter training programme that ACC5 has gone through. Unlike other years where the christmas fat was still noticable on us in May, this winter ACC5 went through a rigorous training programme, the result of which being that there is no fat on us at all (none at all? No, some of us skipped winter training but Big Lad didn’t, and thats the point here).

So Marvin one hops the ball to the bowler end to reduce the chances of a miracle happening even more. But indeed, the complete lack of fat on the shin of BigLad comes into play. The ball ricochets of Big lad’s shin and as if it was struck by a piece of willow races through the covers, untouchable as if Kevin Pietersen had placed it there.

Now this rigorous training over winter which included a strenous diet was to have even more effect.

Take a good look at this picture.



No, this is not the traditional way two ACC5 players greet each other after a hard and tough week apart, and no it is also not a sample of new reproductive patterns among middleaged men, it is the rolling of the pitch before the game. Normally the weight of two ACC5 members would ensure a pitch as flat as a pancake, and yes perhaps if our skipper wasn’t on the other side of the planet scouting for Ozzie talent we would have managed this flatness, but it was not to be. For besides fatless Big Lad, stand in Skipper Paddy Phillips has joined a gym, changed his working habits and shed the much needed weight that we were counting on to make our pitch playable.

With what result? Well the five lbw’s were already mentioned but what to think of the first legal ball ACC5 faces when batting (Naturally in a clubsandwich one would start the second half with a new slice, so the very first ball of the second innings was a wide).

A wormburner. The author got to wear a duckbill for a platinum duck, thanks to the changed eating habits of his teammates. It was good to see them both behind the BBQ afterwards.

Runs were made however, though not a-plenty:

Robert Wolfe               0
Bert Hartskeerl            25
Robert England            29
Paul Liebenberg            4
Frank vd Meijden           0
Alex Taylor                    2
Joost Bakker                 1
Richard Matchett          21
Marvin Watts               20 n.o.
Patrick Phillips             2
Richard Wolfe              0 n.o.

Great to see Robert England who is from a yet-to-be-named country in Europe topscore for us with actual coverdrives all along the ground for four.

It came down to the last wicket.

Richard Wolfe, although injured had to come in and face three stiff deliveries from their overklasse bowler and managed to stay out of the way of two and glove the one to safety. Then of course it was time to finish in style. A four to tie, and to complete the sandwich, a wide to end a fantastic first game of the season.